Samisms

You say the darnedest things.  Here is a short list of my favorites.

 

Jesus is watching you…:

Mommy, does Jesus live in animals’ hearts?
Yes, honey, I think so.
Then why didn’t I see him when we cut open the deer?  Hrrumph. (storming off)  Fall 2010

You know, Jesus is watching and you’re being mean to me. Summer 2011

Headaches are when Satan tells you to do something and you say no.  March 2012

Just plain cute:

You’re driving me banana-nuts!, Mar 2012

This is ridiculous, just ridiculous! (re DIK a lus)  With Aunt Pammy in ER waiting room with croup, Fall 2007

Holy cow, it’s dad!  Fall 2007

Hey mommy, I love this holy moly (rolly polly bug).  Summer 2007

For Halloween, I can be Batman, mommy you can be Robin, and daddy you can be….BatGirl! September 2011

Sam, what would you like from McDonalds?
A hangaber, with pickles., Age 1-6…just didn’t have the hear to correct her.

Hey Sam!  Look at that up on the…
Mom, I am on the phone.  Please don’t interrupt.
Oh sorry. (she returns to her pretend phone conversation)
Sorry about that, that was just the driver. April 2012

 

Facing real life:

While passing the Victoria Secret mural-poster:  Gasp. Blush. Gawk. Blurt, “She’s in her underware!” January 2012

Oma, Daddy is building me a barn, and we are going to have 7 pigs, and lots of chickens, and 5 girl cows and one boy cow and the girl cows are going to have babies so they can have milk, and we are going to have a girl and boy horse.
Sam, don’t you want lots of mommy and daddy cows?  Why 5 girls and 1 boy?
Mom, (pats my leg with her hand), you only NEED ONE boy cow.  October 2012

(Laughing at one of my dad’s jokes)
Opa, hahahaHA!  You’re…such…an…old guy!  November 2012

Don’t worry mommy, Mrs. Harris says everybody gets to start over tomorrow.   April 2012

 

Best descriptions:

Mommy my brain is beating like my heart. (3 a.m.)
Does it hurt?
Yeah, real bad.
Honey, that’s called “throbbing”.  October 2012

(To her teacher)
It feels like all of my cells got in a line and are going around and around in a pattern and my head feels like, bubble bubble POP!
Oh my, I think what you’re feeling is stress.  November 2012

 

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